Overheard in New York

Our New Motto

Perceptive woman: Anytime you overhear people, if you only hear a second of what they say, it's always completely stupid.

--Greenwich Village


Is It Wrong That This Seems Reasonable to Us?

(cabbie cuts bus off, both cab and bus are stopped at traffic light. Bus driver opens his window)
Bus driver: I'm gonna hit one of you! You know, it's my goal to hit one of you people before I retire, it really is--you almost just made it happen! You people gotta learn someday! (turns to passenger) We're allowed one accident per year. I'm saving all of mine for that.

--M15 Bus to South Ferry

That's Why It's the Ironyvator

Dude #1: What're you even talking about?
Dude #2: The thing with Cheryl.
Dude #1: What's wrong with you? That was this morning! Get over it, already!
Dude #2: Uh...what'd you think I was talking about?
Dude #1: The asshole who shoved past us on the escalator.
Dude #2: Oh...I didn't notice.
Dude #1: See? That kind of thing, that's what Cheryl was talking about. She has a point, you know.

Now Shut the Fuck Up, You Unwanted Accident

Little Girl: Mommy, why do people in New York always wear black?
Mommy: I don't know. Maybe they just don't like looking pretty.

--Upper East Side

Intercom: Please take a headset before you get on the plane, because they're free now. They're actually free once you get on the plane, but I charge $50 labor for bringing them to you once you're on. So it's in your best interests to take one now. Can you tell I'm a happy person?

--LaGuardia

Okay so If I had to overhear one of my conversations it would definitely be

One of the trillion people who read my blog daily ? - Hey Z, why are you being such a crappy blogger?
Lazy Z - bah, I donno man just with school and stuff...
OTPWRMBD - well get your act together, girl !

I will. I will.

Here  is the link to Overheard in New York, A website that has left me laughing hysterically countless times...